GOODBYE TO YOU
by enov10
Summary: BREAKING DAWN ALTERNATIVE ONE-SHOT: Bella says goodbye to Jacob, her friends and family, and her humanity, while Jacob mourns her loss and lives in the aftermath of her 'death'.


"Goodbye to You"

Starts at the wedding in B/D...

_Jacob walks through the trees, his eyes on the bride a couple hundred feet ahead, dancing with __**him**_**. **_He wants nothing more than to tear the leech apart; if he didn't exist, Bella would have become Mrs. Black. She would have lived a long, happy life._

_As if fate intended to mock him at his lowest point, he heard Bella whisper to Edward, "I love you, Edward. Today is the happiest day of my life."_

_'Maybe I should leave,' he thought to himself as the pain threatened to take over. _

_He couldn't leave._

_This was his last goodbye._

_He had to see her, one last time._

_Edward realizes that Jacob is waiting for Bella in the woods, and leads her to him. He wants to distance himself from Jacob's pain; it is but a mirror of the pain he had suffered not so long ago. The thought of losing Bella..._

_He felt sorry for Jacob, and understood him better than he ever cared to admit._

"_Jacob!" Bella exclaimed as she launched herself into his arms._

"_Hey Bells. Sorry I'm late," he said as he wrapped his arms around her, engulfing her tiny frame with his usual bear hug._

"_I'm so glad you came."_

"_I wouldn't miss seeing you like this for the world. You're beautiful. So beautiful."_

_They weren't really dancing, per se, but moved back and forth, hugging each other. Bella was aware that this would be the last time she would see him, and though she had said goodbye to him, over and over, this time seemed like it would be the final time._

_Two songs later, Jacob started to move away from Bella._

_The moment she had dreaded had finally arrived. _

_This was just the beginning of the goodbyes._

_She looked up at him, tears streaming down her face as she yearned to memorize all of him. She wanted to keep him alive in her memory._

"_Jake,"_

"_I love you, Bells. I always have and always will. Remember me, Bella, when I won't be here anymore. Remember me. Please."_

_He bent his head down and kissed her forehead and cheek._

"_Jacob," Bella cried as he let go of her._

"_I have to go, Bells. Please, don't cry. I don't want this to be the last image I have of you."_

_Bella controls her sobbing, and wipes away her tears._

"_Still friends?"_

_He grins at her, and continues to walk away from her._

"_Goodbye, Bells."_

_She watches him walk away, her hands clenched in fists._

_As the finality of her humanity approaches, she realizes just how much she had to give up for immortality._

_When Edward comes to get her, Bella leaves with him, but not before turning back to look into the trees one last time._

_They continue to dance the night away, participating in all of the usual wedding festivities. Jasper feels Bella's fluctuating moods and helps her when he can._

_Edward's angry at Jacob for making her sad, but realizes this perfect day would eventually end with Bella crying for those she would leave behind. _

_The reception has ended, and the time had finally arrived for Bella to say her goodbyes._

_Edward leads her to their high school friends, who were seated at a table, chatting away._

"_Gosh, Bella, it was such a beautiful wedding!" Jess exclaimed, smiling as she took Mike's hands in hers. _

_"You'll have to tell Alice, she organized the whole thing," Bella said laughingly as Alice winked at her from across the dance floor._

_"When do you leave for Alaska?" Mike asks as he finishes his drink._

_Bella glances at Edward before answering._

_"In a few weeks. When are you guys leaving for college?"_

_"Ben and I are going to leave next week. I have so much shopping to do, and I want to get settled before classes start," Angela answered._

_"I'm leaving this weekend, I'm so ready for California!" Jessica exclaimed._

_"Mike, where are you going to school?" Edward asks to be polite. He already knows, of course, but decides to join the conversation for once._

_"Arizona State. I'm heading to your home state, Bella. You'll have to come visit if you're ever in the area."_

_Bella smiles at him sadly, something that doesn't go unnoticed by Edward. She knows she can't just wander down the streets of Arizona once she become one of_ _**them**_. _If she ever enjoys the sun again, it will have to be somewhere remote, somewhere she can't be seen. Edward knows how much she'll miss the sun; the real one and the __**other**_ _sun as well._

_They all sit and continue to chat for a few more minutes. Edward is surprised to find that he might actually care for these humans. They were friends, of sorts. The first humans to enter his circle. Well, maybe not Mike, who was currently picturing Bella in various forms of lingerie. _

_"We should probably get going," Angela said regretfully._

_"Okay," Bella's voice quivered as she stood up from her chair._

_"You'll have to stay in touch, and we'll all have to get together over Christmas," Ben added._

_Bella nodded, avoiding Edward's piercing look._

_"No matter what, we all get together in ten years for our class reunion." Jessica commanded._

_"Take care, Bella, and congratulations once again," Mike said as he hugged Bella, a little too comfortably for Edward's taste._

_"Thanks for coming, Mike. Good luck in school," Bella said as Edward shook Mike's hand reluctantly. _

_"Bye, Bella," Jessica said as she hugged Bella, and then threw herself at Edward. "Bye, Edward,"_

_"Goodbye, Jessica," he replied, attempting to hide his laughter. Apparently, Jessica had dared herself to touch him once before the day was over._

_"I'm going to miss you, Bella. Promise you'll stay in touch," Angela said as she got teary-eyed. _

_Bella hesitated before making the false promise. _

_"I will. Take care, Angela. Thanks for being a good friend."_

_"Congratulations, man," Ben said as he shook Edward's hand. "Good luck to the both of you."_

_"Thank you, Ben," Edward replied. _

_Bella watched her friends drive away from the Cullen house, and she was surprised to find that she secretly wished she could have been just like them, just for a moment or two._

_"Bella," Alice's bell-like voice chimed in, "it's time to go. Jasper's going to pull the car around."_

_"I need more time, Alice!" Bella pleaded._

_"What?" Alice asked, her eyes narrowed at Bella's face as she tried to 'see' the future._

_"I mean, I need some time to say a proper goodbye to my parents. Give me an hour."_

_"Of course, Bella. Take all the time you need," Edward commented, frowning at Alice._

_"Of course, Bella. Let's get you out of your wedding dress."_

_Esme, Renee, and Alice helped Bella out of her wedding dress, and into her 'going away' outfit. Alice and Esme tactfully left the room, giving Bella a few moments alone with her mother._

_"Oh baby, I can't believe you're a married woman now. How did you get so old to go from being a daughter to a wife. Next thing you know, you'll be calling me to tell me I'm going to be grandmother!"_

_Bella sighed mournfully. She didn't have the heart to tell her mother that there would be no grandchildren in her future. That the line ended right here._

_"Mom, I love you. Thanks for everything, for the last seventeen years."_

_"Oh baby, you really are the best daughter I could have asked for. Now, don't forget to take the quilt with you to Alaska; it'll be cold up there."_

_"I love you, Mom. Forever," Bella cried as she hugged her mother._

_"I love you too, baby." Renee_ _said as she hugged her daughter._

_Mother and daughter walked down the stairs hand in hand. Phil waited for them at the bottom of the staircase._

_"Hey Phil," Bella said, hugging her step-father._

_"Hey Bella. Congratulations again."_

_"Thanks Phil, and thanks for making my mom happy. Take care of each other."_

_"Will do, Bella."_

_Bella made her way through the room to find Charlie standing against a wall, wiping the tears from his face._

_"Dad!" Bella exclaimed, wrapping her arms around his waist._

_"Hey, Bells. You better get going. You're going to be late."_

_"I love you, Dad. I'm so glad I got to spend these last two years with you."_

_"I'm glad you came to Forks, Bells. I love you too, always._

_"Take care of yourself, okay? Ease up on the steak and beer."_

_Charlie chuckled. _

_"I'll try."_

_"Dad?"_

_"Yeah, baby?"_

_"Look out for Jacob, will you."_

_"I will, don't worry."_

_Edward walked over to them, and shook Charlie's hand._

_"Edward, you take care of my daughter."_

_Bella saw Edward's eyes tighten a bit, but he smiled at his father-in-law._

_"I will, Charlie."_

_Bella walked to the car reluctantly. As Edward opened the door for her, she looked up at him and saw the pain in his eyes. He knew she was hurting._

_"Bye, Bella," Renee waved from the stairs. Bella ran straight towards her mother and father and threw her arms around both of her parents._

_"I love you guys, forever. Goodbye Mom, Dad."_

_"Love you too, Bells. We'll see you soon._

_'No, you won't," Bella thought as she let go of her parents' hands._

_XXX_

_Edward slows down the car on the highway._

_"What is it, Edward?" Edward nods his head towards her window. Bella turns to see a figure emerge from the trees._

_Her favorite wolf._

_"He's having a hard time letting you go."_

_Bella exited the car, and Jacob made his way to her. She ran her fingers through his fur, and Jacob let the tears escape his eyes._

_"Jake, go home, to La Push. Finish school. Find a nice girl, get married, and have lots of kids. Live your life, Jake. I promise to never forget you. You'll always be with me."_

_Edward nodded to his one-time rival._

_"Goodbye, Jacob."_

_Jacob waits by the side of the road as Edward and Bella drive off. He waits until he can't see Bella anymore, then howls into the silent night._

XXX

_One month later_

_Charlie was at the Black house, watching a game with Billy, as Jacob sat at the kitchen table, carving away. Jacob heard a car pull up to the house, but had no interest in investigating. _

_When Rachel opened the door, Deputy Mark stepped into the house with a horrified look on his face._

_"Mark, what are you doing here?" Charlie asked, getting up from his seat._

_"Chief...I..I..."_

_Jacob dropped the wood carving and stumbled towards Charlie, his arms shaking violently._

_"Chief Swan...there's been an accident," Mark spit out, wiping the sweat on his forehead._

_"What accident? Who? Are their injuries? Did the ambulance arrive yet?"_

_Mark shook his head._

_"Chief, no. The accident didn't happen here."_

_"I don't get it, Mark. What are you trying to say?"_

_"It's Bella, Chief Swan."_

_"BELLA!" exclaimed Charlie. Billy locked eyes with Jacob, before nodding towards his shaking form. Jacob breathed in and out. He knew this day would come._

_"Dr. Cullen called. The U.S. embassy in Brazil called him. Bella and Edward were in an accident."_

_"WHAT? What happened? How are they?"_

_Deputy Mark couldn't say anything; he didn't know how he was supposed to tell a father that his daughter had been taken from him. No parent should have to bury their child._

_He shook his head._

_"Mark," Charlie's voice became desperate. Jacob could hear his heart racing. _

_"Their boat was found last week. Evidence suggests that they...Edward and Bella...are lost at sea. The Cullens left last week, and have used every resource available to find them. Divers, the coast guard...they've searched up and down the coast of South America."_

_"What are you telling me, Mark?" Somewhere in the back of Charlie's mind, he understood what Mark had been telling him. Yet, his heart refused to believe it._

_"I'm sorry, Chief. Bella and Edward...they're dead."_

_Jacob caught Charlie before he fell to the floor, screaming._

_"NO!"_

_XXX_

_Many of the good people of Forks attended Bella's memorial service; they wanted to support their Chief of Police on one of the hardest days of his life. _

_Jacob arrived just as the minister started the services. He sat in the back row of the church by himself. He spotted his father sitting next to Charlie, who sat next to Renee. Both were inconsolable. _

_The pack refused to come. They said they had no intention of sitting through a memorial service for a 'selfish bitch' like Bella Cullen, someone who willingly put her father and mother through hell, gave them the worst pain of their life...all so she could live happily ever after with her leech. _

_They agreed that they should have gone-for Charlie, but the man hadn't uttered a word in a week, except to take a phone call from the doctor leech. It seemed the leeches would stay in South America, because mama leech was in no condition to travel; the loss of a son had rendered her 'unfit' to travel. They would hold their own services there._

_Jacob had been by the Cullen house before the service._

_The place had been cleaned out._

_It looked like the Cullens found their escape, and he wanted nothing more than to set the damn place on fire. _

_Since the pack refused to attend the memorial service, they helped set up chairs and tables outside of the Swan house. Emily and Leah helped with food preparations. It was the least they could do for Charlie._

_XXX_

_Jacob ran off after the service; he needed to run away. It seemed that had been the one thing he was good at: running away when the pain became unbearable._

_Unconsciously, he ran to the mountain top where he had kissed Bella. _

_She really was gone._

_He was the last to arrive at the luncheon, but didn't have an appetite. Instead, he made his way to her bedroom and sat at the foot of her bed._

_Charlie, who had been hiding out in his own room, stepped into the room and sat next to Jacob. He looked like he hadn't slept in days. _

_"She asked me to look out for you, you know?" Charlie whispered._

_Jacob nodded._

_XXX_

_Jacob spent much of the next year in wolf form, wandering around aimlessly, mourning the loss of a girl he once knew. The pain was unbearable; he could only tolerate it in wolf form, so he stayed wolf. A part of him hoped she would return, but the rational part of his mind realized he would be stupid to wish that. If she came back, he would have to see her as one of __**them**__. _

_He returned to La Push, on the one year anniversary of her death._

_Billy welcomed him with open arms. _

XXX

_He stopped by Charlie's the next day._

_When Charlie opened the door, Jacob hated Bella, more than he ever knew possible. All this time, he only thought about his pain, but here was the man who was probably suffering more than he could ever imagine._

_Charlie had aged about ten years; he looked thin, his face hallow, and his brown eyes conveyed a depth of pain that made Jacob flinch._

_'How could you do this, Bella? How could you do this to your old man?'_

_Charlie went back to the couch and sat down in the recliner, and mindlessly watched the television. _

_"Son, you need to stop running away. She would not have wanted this for you. You need to move on with your life, Jacob."_

_Jacob didn't bother trying to hide his emotions; he let the tears fall freely. He noticed Charlie wiping away a lone tear. He made his way upstairs to the bathroom when he caught an unusual, sweet-n-sickly scent; one that he didn't recognize._

_When he threw open the door to Bella's room, he caught a strong whiff of leech scent, and didn't know whether to be pleased that she had returned, or devastated that she hadn't bothered to see him. The scent also spread to Charlie's bedroom._

_It looked like Bella checked in on her old man._

_Why couldn't she check in on him too?_

_After a few more minutes of conversation with Charlie, Jacob took off to the woods, hoping to catch her scent. The pack hadn't found anything at all. She must have driven here and just jumped up to her old window._

_Charlie's words echoed in his mind._

_He could continue wandering around aimlessly, trying to chase her scent._

_Or he could let her go. Again. Try to, at least._

_XXX_

_Time heals all wounds, but some wounds are burned too deep to ever be healed completely. With the passing of each year, Jacob learned he could have a life outside of Bella. He finished school, dated many girls-but never falling in love with any of them, became a mechanic, and accepted his role as Alpha._

_He would catch her scent at Charlie's every once in a while. For her (would-be) thirtieth birthday, he left her a bracelet with more wolf charms._

_When he visited Charlie to see if she had accepted his token, he was surprised to find her scent down in the living room, so close to Charlie's sleeping form on the recliner._

Only, as Jacob discovered in about three seconds, Charlie wasn't sleeping.

He smelled Bella's scent over Charlie's skin, and wonders if she revealed herself to her father, or simply visited him after his passing.

XXX

The entire town of Forks arrives for Charlie's funeral, along with many La Push residents. They have the utmost respect for this man.

When the minister talks about Charlie's greatest loss, his greatest pain of having to lose a child before her time, several of the pack members-all sitting in the back row, stiffen when they catch a scent coming from the open doors.

It disappears before anyone can do anything about it.

Renee and Phil flew in for the funeral. Jacob's stomach tightens as he realizes this is the last piece of _Bella's humanity in front of him. Renee looks worn and tired._

"Mrs. Dwyer, I'm Jacob. We never spoke before..." he wasn't in the right state of mind to speak to her at Bella's funeral.

"You're Bella's Jake," Renee said stoically.

Bella's Jake.

Jacob wanted to cry, but didn't.

"Yes," he whispered.

"She loved you, you know. I remember how she used to talk about you in her e-mails. I think...I think you were the light in her life, Jacob."

"Thank you for saying that."

Renee studied his expression for a moment.

"Charlie said he was afraid you wouldn't move on with your life, and I'm here to tell you the same thing he did. You need to move on."

"I am moving on...sort of."

"Try harder, Jacob. Let her go. She's not coming back."

Jacob wonders if Bella's listening to this.

Jacob makes a quick trip to Charlie's house, and runs up the stairs to her bedroom. She's been here within the past hour.

His bracelet is still there.

He's devastated.

There's a note laying next to the bracelet.

"Let me go, Jake. Give this to the girl you're supposed to be with."

He pockets the bracelet, thinking to himself, 'I did.'

XXX

Jacob learns that Renee is staying in town, and wonders if Bella will visit her mother.

When Jacob arrives at Renee's room the next day, he catches Bella's scent.

"Some of us were going to go through Charlie's things, get everything in order. If there is anything you _want..."_

"I'll be there."

XXX

Jacob is surprised to learn that Charlie has left everything to him, and a note that read, 'You've always been like a son to me, and you're the closest thing I have left of Bella.'

As they clear out the rest of the house, Jacob is hesitant to go to Bella's bedroom. He knows it will be the last time.

Renee follows him upstairs, and together they pack away her things. Charlie never touched anything in her room.

"I sold the house in Phoenix. I didn't have it in me to keep it, but I took Bella's things with me. I can't believe our family just ended-there's no more."

Jacob is looking out the window and swears he sees long, brown hair in one of the trees.

"I probably won't be coming back up here-there's no need to anymore. I'd like to visit the cemetery, to see Bella and Charlie one last time."

XXX

Jacob is standing in between Bella and Charlie's graves, holding the note in his hand. Renee left a few minutes ago, and he doesn't know why he's still here.

"Jake," a bell-like voice whispers in the wind.

She's so close. All he has to do is turn around.

He reads the note again. 'Let me go, Jake.'

Jacob wonders why she is here, talking to him. She told him to let her go, but now she's behind him. Typical Bella. Sending out mixed signals.

"Let me go, Bella."

He walks away without turning to see her.

Jacob wants to remember _**his**_ _Bella-the clumsy, pale, human girl. That is the memory he's carried with him, and it's __**that**__ memory he will keep._

XXX

Jacob is working by himself at the garage when a car pulls up.

"Can I help you?" he asks, stepping out of the garage to help the customer.  
_  
A young woman, probably twenty-five, steps out of the car and approaches him._

When she smiles at him, his heart stutters, and he's got butterflies in his stomach.

"I'm Michelle. My car is making strange noises."

"I can help with that. I'm Jacob, by the way," he said, offering her his hand to shake.

She puts her small hand in his, and things are never the same again.

XXX

Michelle is very different from Bella. Jacob's enamored with her. The pack can't believe he hasn't imprinted yet, and are concerned about what would happen if he did. Everyone else has, except for Jacob.

He realizes he's fallen in love with Michelle, and decides to stop phasing. It was time.

He proposes one year later.

The night before the wedding, Jacob walks along First Beach by himself. He's happy. Very happy. He looks to the night sky and hopes that wherever she is, his friend is happy too.

Jacob takes the bracelet and buries it in front of the stump he and Bella had sat on many moons ago.

Michelle would get a new bracelet.

XXX

There is new meaning in Jacob's life. He's a son, a brother, an uncle, and now a father. Twins. A boy and a girl.

When Bella learns of the news, she's happy for her friend, but pained at the same time. The twins...should have been theirs. She mourns for the loss of that future only for a minute because Edward is due home from a hunting trip with Emmett and Jasper.

She's happy. She doesn't regret her decision, except on certain occasions.

She's glad Charlie got to see one last time before he died, even if it was in the last few minutes of his life. Renee got to see her as well. Now that both of her parents were gone, and Jacob lived in La Push-where she was undoubtedly forbidden, she didn't have any ties left to her human life.

That thought bothered her more than she ever cared to admit.

XXX

Jacob enjoys everything life has thrown his way: children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren. He makes sure Michelle knows that she was his saving grace, and he tells her he loves her everyday.  
_  
Decades have gone by, and as with every mortal life, death was knocking on his door._

Michelle had passed away three years ago, and he was alone now.

He goes back to the beach and digs up the bracelet. Jacob makes his way to the cemetery with a bracelet, an old picture, and a note.

Jacob leaves the items by Bella's grave.

When he dies, his friend will be alone in the world. She'll have her family, yes, but no one from her human life.

She would be alone, and he knew she would feel the loss.

How could she not?

He places fresh flowers on his wife's grave, and tells her he'll see her soon.

XXX

Jacob is sitting on his couch, looking at old photo albums. He was truly a blessed man. There was a time in his life when he felt nothing would ever be okay again, but all that had been wronged had been righted again.

All but one.

She's on his mind, now, more than ever. He realizes his time is up, and wonders where she is and how she is doing.

He failed at preserving her humanity, and still regretted it to this day.

Jacob stares at a picture of himself in his teen years...the picture was taken when Bella was learning to ride bikes.

He remembered arguing with his sister about the move Titanic-how stupid it was that Rose would think about Jack when she died instead of the man she spent her life with.

It makes sense now.

There are some types of love that remain with you, within you, forever. He understood why he thinks of Bella now.

XXX

Bella stands over her grave in the middle of the night and reads the note from Jacob.

Bella,  
This is the girl I remember; this is the girl in my memory. I can't see you any other way. Forgive me. _My time is coming to an end, and I ask you again, to remember me. I'm giving you this bracelet back, hoping you'll take it this time. We're supposed to be friends forever, remember? I won't be here, but you will be, so it's up to you now.' I know you won't say it, but I know you'll feel the loss. Look at the bracelet, and just...remember me, and you won't be lonely anymore._

Jake

P.S. I'm happy, Bells. I've had the best life. I only wish you did too.

'I wish I did too Jake, I wish I did too.'


End file.
